Haru, Get Out Of The Sink.
'Ah, yes,' you might say, nodding sagely. 'He's driven by his deep-seated love for his friends. I've seen this before.'
You would be incorrect. Haruka is driven by his uncontrollable desire to be immersed in water at all times.
Here are some notes I scribbled down on the train yesterday, illustrating why I should probably not write Free! fanfiction:
I sort of want to write a Haru/water fic, but I've got no idea how to make it work. Possibly for the best. Makoto keeps walking in on Haru and... water... in compromising situations? THIS IS DIFFICULT TO ENVISION.
Haru wouldn't be remotely abashed, either; he'd just stare at Makoto with his perfectly serious expression.
Haru wears his swimsuit in the bath. Is it more intimate, in his eyes, to be in his swimming gear in the water than it is to be nude in the water?
Am I seriously thinking about this question?
This makes a compromising Haru/water situation even more difficult to depict, particularly if Makoto is to recognise it as such. Blast!
How do you write about a guy losing his virginity to a swimming pool???
Part of the problem, I think, is that I'd want to take the Haru/water pairing seriously if I ever wrote fanfiction for it, because my Haru/water 'shipping is entirely sincere; it's easily the truest pairing in Free! and possibly the truest pairing in any work of fiction ever created. But it's inherently absurd! If I try to write about it in a serious style, the mere fact that I'm working in a serious style will make it seem silly! So I think this will probably have to remain unwritten. Sorry, Haru; I've failed you. You'll have to assuage your disappointment by sitting in a fountain and staring unsettlingly at passers-by.