I think this is my fourth 'pairing one particular character up with everyone
' fic. Previous characters who's received this treatment: Patrick Jane, Jeff Winger, Nagito Komaeda. Now it's Mike Munroe's turn, apparently. (There's a definite 'overconfident arsehole' pattern emerging, although one of those characters is in fact an underconfident arsehole.) I'm not sure how I got into this particular ficcing habit, but, hey, I'm enjoying myself.
This turned out a little more serious than I was expecting.Title:
SatisfiedFandom: Until DawnRating:
Mike Munroe has a lot of attractive friends, and he'd make out with all of them if he could.
It’s an hour since Beth left the lodge, and Emily’s still saying that she’s sure they’re gonna come back any moment, that they’re obviously just hiding to freak them all out, like assholes. But she’s stepped a little closer to Mike and taken his hand. It’s not something she does often. He kind of needs it. He tries to focus on her hand in his, to use that as his anchor. They’re fine. They’re fine.
It’s four hours since Beth left the lodge, and Emily’s freaking out. Mike’s actually glad of it; at least trying to calm her down is a distraction from everything going on in his own head. His stomach feels like a plummeting elevator that’s never going to hit the bottom.
It’s a day since Beth left the lodge. Mike has never seen Emily cry before. It makes her seem more human; it makes him feel closer to her. She’s never been more important to him than she is in this moment.
And, in the same moment, he knows they’re going to have to break up. They’ll look at each other and the prank will be all they can think of.
It’s a week. It’s a month. It’s a year.-
Mike comes over to ‘help Chris pack’ for the Blackwood getaway. Turns out he’s actually come over to lounge on Chris’s bed and talk constantly while Chris does all the packing, but it’s not like Chris was expecting anything else.
“It’s gonna be weird to be back, huh?” Chris asks, quietly, when it starts looming too large to ignore.
Mike stares up at the ceiling for a little too long before he says, “It’ll be fine.”
There’s an uncomfortable silence. Maybe Chris shouldn’t have said anything.
“So,” Mike says at last. “You and Ashley. You think this is gonna be the year it happens?”
Chris ducks his head and focuses very hard on folding pants.
“Note that I said ‘the year’ it happens,” Mike says. “Not the day. Not the month. You two have been dancing around each other for literal years.”
“It’ll be nice to see her,” Chris mutters. He starts rummaging through his underwear drawer. “I’m not... I’m not thinking about anything past that.”
“Have you guys ever considered a threesome?”
“What?” Chris asks, fumbling a pair of boxers.
“Look,” Mike says, hopping off the bed. Which is probably for the best, because Mike being on his bed has abruptly become very weird. “You’re into Ashley. Ashley’s into you. There is no way you don’t both know this already. I mean, there are undiscovered mountain tribes that know this by now. There’s gotta be a reason you’re not together yet.” He shrugs. “So, the way I figure it, maybe you need a go-between to take the pressure off.”
Chris stares at him. “Oh, my God, what?
“I can turn down the moves, if you’re worried she’ll end up wanting me more,” Mike says. He leans in, definitely too close, and winks. “If you’re worried you’ll
end up wanting me more, I guess you’re just gonna have to take that risk.”
“Are we actually having this conversation?”
“Well, it doesn’t actually have
to be me. Maybe you kids would be happier with Josh. I’m just putting myself forward for consideration.”
“Why are we still
having this conversation?”
Mike shrugs. “Just a suggestion.”
Jesus. Chris won’t stand a chance if Mike ever ends up in bed with Ash. This absolutely cannot happen.
“We could take things slow, if that makes things easier,” Mike offers. “Start with just you and me, and then we can see if we can bring Ash into it.”
“You know, man,” Chris says, “I think I can probably do the rest of the packing on my own.”-
“Michael... I’m just gonna lay it out, otherwise this whole weekend’s gonna suck ass for everyone.” Matt shifts on his feet. “This is super awkward, and we all know it. Let’s just acknowledge it now and move on. Okay?”
Mike nods slightly. Matt wonders what’s going on in his head. Does he think they’re just talking about Emily? Or is he reliving the same memories as Matt, the two of them tangled in his bedsheets, Mike breathing filthy things into Matt’s ear...He makes you think he cares,
Emily said bitterly to Matt, the evening he got together with her. It had taken a real effort not to say I know.
“I hear you, man,” Mike says. “I get it. I don’t wanna make this weird.”
Matt lets out a breath. “Cool. So we’re good?”
Emily raises her eyebrows. “You guys gonna make out now?”
Mike meets Matt’s eyes, just for a moment. Matt looks away.
It’s always kind of worried him, that Emily was thinking about Mike on the day they got together. But he guesses he was doing the same thing.-
“I think Josh was flirting with me,” Jess says.
“You want to invite him up with us?”
Mike grins. “Absolutely.”
For a moment, Jess loses her grip on her act. “Uh...”
“We don’t have to,” Mike says.
Okay, no, she’s not letting him win this. He wants to play Josh Threesome Chicken? She’s gonna kick his ass.
“And I thought I’d have to be the one who suggested it.” She tosses a smirk his way. “Let’s go pick him up.”
She pushes open the door to the lodge. Josh looks up as she does, startled, and for a moment there’s something in his eyes when he sees her that makes her uncomfortable.
“Sorry,” Jess says. “Just realised we forgot something.”
“I’m just gonna laugh at you if you forgot to bring condoms,” Josh says.
Mike slips an arm around Jess’s shoulders and winks at Josh. “We forgot you, big guy. What’s the point of the love shack without a little Washington in it?”
Josh looks at Mike for a moment.
“I look damn hot in this shirt, but I’d look even hotter out of it, huh?” he asks, quietly.
Mike jerks back like Josh has punched him.
Josh sighs. “Sorry. Sorry. Forget I said that. You two go have fun.”
Jess looks at Mike. He’s just... standing there, frozen, staring at Josh.
“Mike,” she says softly, tugging on his arm.
She has to guide him out into the snow, and he barely reacts, barely seems to know what’s happening. It’s like he’s dreaming.
He starts to come alive a little as they make their way to the cabin, starts to crack jokes again, but none of it feels right. Something about this evening is wrong.-
“You know we’ve never made out?” Mike asks.
Sam looks at him for a long moment. “Actually, yeah, I think I did know that.”
“Kinda weird, don’t you think?”
“Downright spooky,” Sam says. “But maybe not actually the weirdest thing I’ve heard tonight, Mike.”
He shrugs. “I’ll give you that.”
“Why are you bringing this up now?” Sam asks. “We’re trapped on a mountain that’s trying to kill us. I just knocked the head off a flaming wendigo.”
“Yeah, and it was hot.”
It catches her by surprise, and she actually finds herself smiling. It feels like it’s been a long time.
“You look like you’ve spent three days sleeping in a ditch,” she says. “Slightly less hot.” Truth be told, the beat-up and bloodied look is kind of doing it for her, but she’d probably need a tetanus shot if she kissed him right now. “Let’s just focus on getting out alive, okay?”
Mike gives a big sigh, all mock-reluctant. “I guess.”
She can’t stop glancing over at him as they leave the room, and she’s annoyed with herself for it.-
Mike can’t breathe after they find Hannah’s diary.
He was actually into Hannah. That might be the worst part. He really
liked her, more than most. If he hadn’t been such a cowardly asshole, he’d have ended things with Emily and asked her out for real.
But no. He’d gone along with the prank, because he figured maybe that way he could get in some making out with Hannah without having to drop Emily. Because it wasn’t enough for him. Nothing’s ever enough for him. You’ve always had to have everyone, haven’t you, Mike?
He’s done ruining lives. These people are precious to him, everyone on this mountain, and he’s going to fucking save them. What happens after that, what his relationship with them is, he can think about that if he lives long enough for it to matter.